“Hey Akmed. do you think we should tell our exalted leader about the latest news?”
“What are you talking about Mo?”
“We are supposed to launch a massive attack against the infidels, Jews, and less then faithful followers of Allah as soon as the spawn of Satan Naval forces leave the waters near Iran.”
“Akmed, don’t you read the New York Times, or Washington Post??”
“Mo, you son of a diseased camel and infidel whore, you know I can not read any thing printed in the tongue of the infidel … I break out in hives!” “Tell me, what you have found out.”
“The Great Satan is so weak he can not even keep his own people from sharing their secrets with us. And we are not talking about some secret infidel agent … no, the Great Satan’s own print media willingly provides us with the time table for their fleets movement(s) in and out of the Gulf.”
From the Washington Post, via the Associated Press, Tuesday, July 10, 2007; 4:20 PM
WASHINGTON — After a much-publicized military buildup in the Persian Gulf, the United States is now planning to have only one aircraft carrier in the region for part of this year.
In what officials have said was partly muscle-flexing toward Iran, the Navy has maintained two aircraft carrier battle groups in area since early this year and twice held major exercises in the Gulf.
But the force could be reduced to one carrier in the coming weeks unless one now there is ordered to stay beyond its planned homecoming or another is rescheduled to go there early, three defense officials said Tuesday.
They spoke on condition of anonymity because they were not allowed to speak on the subject for the record. The military tries to say as little as possible about ship movements for security reasons. (text placed in BOLD by me- the Harbor Master)
“Mo, can this be true? The Great Satan is just giving this information away? If it was our people who would leak this to the enemy they would suffer a quick and painful death. They are either weak, fools, or both”
“Only Allah, or the owners of the NYT know the answers to these questions Akmed. We should just be thankful we are able to enjoy the benefits of the Great Satan’s Freedom of the press. Our grandfathers didn’t have that luxury back during the West’s World War II. But we do now!”
Oh, and Akmed, if you think this is a fluke, the other news agency of the West, Reuters, tries to camouflage it, but says much the same thing. Ya know, sometimes being a terrorist …err freedom fighter for Allah ™ is just too easy.”